It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
