How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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