people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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