I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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