she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
