Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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