I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
