I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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