just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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