Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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