There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
