How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.