Buhtt sex?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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