just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
