You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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