Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
tell me about the eggs
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