I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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