Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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