i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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