Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
