I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
