last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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