dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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