No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
