Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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