These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
