I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize