oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Bring me that man meat
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
