Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Dignity is for republicans.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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