I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize