You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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