with your own penis?
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize
