Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
