Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
