we're blogging at a bar
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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