it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
