i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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