we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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