I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Well I just put wine in my tea
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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