He's been sleeping iwht ***
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I'm going to jail i love you
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
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I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
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Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.