I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
