waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
