My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
