is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
