I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Just pee around me
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
