Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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