I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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