found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
The feeling are messing with the penis
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
