She's JV to your varsity
Plan B is the new Plan A
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
