just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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